Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize