did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Can I color on your dick again?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
