What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize