i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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