Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
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Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
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The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
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