I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
