waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
