There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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