is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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