I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize