yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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