Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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