your thong is hanging out like whoa
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
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