so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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