There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize