I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Operation Purity has been aborted
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
