i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
