I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Randomize
