I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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