If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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