So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
