Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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