I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
