I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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