I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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