We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
