Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
he fucked my hip out of place.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
i need some magic done to my vagina
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize