She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick