she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
