in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize