Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
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She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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