you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize