I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
