I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
50% drunk capacity currently
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
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