Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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