I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
