Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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