I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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