We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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