i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
