Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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