Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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