Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize
