He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
