if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.