Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
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It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
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I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.