I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
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you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
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Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.