those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
