I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize