Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
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