There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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