I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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