Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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